Guidelines For Outer Cape Men’s Circle

• SAFE GROUP: We will all do our part to create an environment where everyone can be real, open and honest with their struggles and victories.

• CONFIDENTIALITY: What is said in the group stays in the group.

• NO FIXING: We are not here to fix each other. Give encouragement! Avoid trying to solve or fix each other.

• NO “CROSS TALK”: Be considerate of others as they are sharing. Avoid side conversations.

• SILENCE: It is important to allow silence in the group as it provides an opportunity for someone to share and for members in the group to process the topic or question being considered. Most importantly, it creates opportunities to listen to the unknown.

• USE “I” STATEMENTS: It’s easy to talk about the issues of others, but for our purposes, we want you to put yourself on the table. Try to use “I” statements rather than “them”, “us”, “we”, etc.

• PAUSE: Allow a pause in conversation after someone shares to give the person sharing the chance to finish and the group the opportunity to consider what was just shared before responding.

• LISTEN: Let’s value one another during the discussions by really listening to what is being shared. Try to avoid thinking about how you are going to respond or what you are going to say next.

• SHARING: Be sensitive about the amount of time you share and how many times you share.

• NO RESCUING: When people are sharing something deeply personal, there can be a tendency to try to make them feel better about themselves or the situation by providing immediate condolences. Resist the temptation to rescue people.

• BE SELF-AWARE: Be self-aware of how you are personally effecting the environment through your words, actions and non-verbal communication.